I tried drawing a 生日贺图for someone just now, and failed miserably...

This is my first time doing such things...my first time.

Somehow I can never get the right tone and shade, the shadows seem to be at the wrong place I dont know how to place it right.

"Learn from observation!" Yea....it s always skills before style. I ll have to learn to walk before I can fly...

 

 

 

 

OMFG I THINK THESE BACKGROUND COLOURS MAKE ME EMO CAN I CHANGE IT BACK TO LIME GREEN+ FLAME RED?????

I can.

 

but why.....I like it now....Dont you think it looks like the cat downstairs that you feed everyday.....

Well actually I had a dream two days ago.

I dreamt that I changed my blog colour scheme to the current 3..................hehehehehehehehehheheehhehehehhehee......

 

干净柔和淡然

 

TAMADE帅极了！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！

从早上到现在一直在看一个人的画...是个大学毕业不久的男生/宿舍很脏/养着2只白色的猫咪/很有爱心/为着自己的梦想一直奋斗着....

看到他说的一翻话：

 

"流浪猫很可怜的 但是捡那两只流浪猫都很乖
也许是被主人抛弃后 在饥饿和寒冷中反省自己
是不是因为自己犯了什么错误 *^*
所以再一次被别人饲养的时候 就变的特乖
特听话不挑食 

希望我屋里的猫越来越多 但流浪猫越来越少"

 

顿时觉得这人真好。。。萌了。

 

画的漫画很搞，值得一看:)

 

 

 

right now I m slipping into my disgusting army green canvas shoes, with blood dripping drown my face cos i was squeezing my pimples just now.

Cant believe months ago when i was making fun of jiaming's pimple on his chin...报应....

so now can someone pls laugh at me so that i can tranfer all my pimples to him or her? I ll pay you 50 cents!

 

And my mom left the house without handing me my allowance for this week..again...plus it s aready thursday...

for the past few days i ve been surviving on the changes i find in my house...that was about 5 bucks

and now i m left with less than 1.

HOW AM I GONNA GO OUT

it s like 12.30 now, maybe i ll be late for CIP...

 

I ll blog when i come back.

CYA

 

==============================

UPDATED

==============================

 

Yea I ve came back from cip :)

 

At first some of us wanted to go to baoguan for basketball-ing after Cip...I was keen.

so.......

1.zhengxiang asked "eh wanna go baoguan to play basketball or not,ask kelvin oso"

2.yelin said ok and happily asked the rest " eh yayi/tiancong/jiajun/everybody wanna play bball???"

3.yayi agreed

4.zhengxiang realised kelvin isnt going to baoguan

5.so he didnt feel like going there too, plus it was going to rain

6.seemed like in the end only yayi and I were left....plus it was going to rain, so everyone decided to go home

7.alot of us board the bus to AMK mrt

8.totally didnt feel like going home,so yelin kept pestering xiaotian/jiajun/yuxiang to tell her where to go

9.yuxiang s going to the library, so he suggested yelin could follow them to the library too.'Them' becos kelvin s bringing him there

10.yelin asked xiaotian if going to the library sounds good to her and brain washed her to thining that it did sound good

11.xiaotian agreed to go to the library too, and drags jiajun along

12.the five of us took 15 mins to get there

13.went to the counter get a library card cos somehow my ezlink card cannot work on the machines...(based on past experiences)

14.borrowed books and sat direct bus home! 162 goes to amk library yeahhh yeahhh yeahhh

 

 

I find my life boring.

 

 

 

oh anyway in my earlier post i was saying that my mom didnt pass me my allowance right? GUESS WHAT I FOUND AT THE DOORSTEP WHEN I WAS LEAVING THE HOUSE??? I FOUND MONEYYYYY $$$$$$$$$$$!!! I bet my mom only realises it after she has locked the door..and she was lazy to unlock it..hahahahaha...

 

 

 

Shall blog about yesterday.

 

I was basically emoing from 11 to about 5, cos lingzhi isnt gonng stay in singapore. Never expected such things...

 

then I went to bugis at 6 plus for the NAFA fine arts graduation show. It was similiar to the other one I saw when I last went to NAFA,cant remember its name...

The impression I got from the works were..."Artistic", "Creative", but all alike.

As if those works were something everyone would do for their final project...Not saying that there s a problem, but aint they a little ordinary?

or maybe I m too shallow to understand those works 还是我审美疲劳了?

The only work which caught my attention was these portraits of famous figures,by this guy named christopher tan. All those potraits were pixelated...and by looking close you see those pixels are actually in the shape of shits. I also saw his little booklet, it says sth like "I maybe shit to you blah blah but it s the way you at me blah blah blah". Or maybe I remembered wrongly. I took his name card btw :D and the reason why I noticed his work was because..one of those figures was Mao.  hahaha...

 

It was only 7 plus when I left NAFA, and I reached there at about 7.. (visited queen street on the way there, yeah)

Didnt bother to look at all the galleries, I could have missed out sth really interesting.

SO I walked along bencoolen road down to SMU, then from where I could see national gallery I followed my senses to the Cathay..took quite some time to get there since I was walking at caterpillar speed...

While walking I thought alot..which I rarely do...haha....I was thinking if I should really follow my dreams, which isnt at all practical for now. I wonder if I m really talented,or am I only a big fish in the pond yet totally negligible in the ocean.. or perhaps I was never a big fish...zzzz...

I should consider myself lucky to be where I am right now, never thought I d be here 5 years ago.So does that mean I might make it somewhere else too?

I know confidence works, I know it too well I sometimes doubt if I really have the ability, or am I just plainly encouraging myself to do better.

These all come into my mind when I m alone. Seems that, I, Have, Always, Been, Alone.

hahahahahah emoing would be the last thing I do. no worries.

 

I have so much to do yet I dont feel like moving at all. I need some motivation.

Long ago my motivation was to become like you...till I came to a realisation that you wouldnt have came so far if not for your family's wealth and your goodlooks.

Eeeeeeeeekkkkkk.

 

And it's chen's birthday tmr..happy birthday. Eeeeeekkkkk chen is aready 27 eeeeekkkk olllllddddddmmmaaaaannnnnnn.

 

 

 

 

Well today I ve decided to write something here.

I ve been updating blogs on xiaonei.com cos it s more private and stuff...which is meaningless cos no one gets to see them..

 

So the holiday has started...long long ago.

I cant remember the last day I attended school, I cant remember who my classmates are I cant remember how...............ARH.

Oh no. Maybe I m gonna die tomorrow. YES. I M GONNA DIE TMR OMGOMGOMGOMG YEAAAAHHHH I VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS DAYYY WWEHEHEHEHE

...............

...

.

.

.

I just cant concentrate on anything right now I think I need to calm down.

Seriously what's driving me mad? I dont know, or maybe I do.

 

KK cip today was alright, not as alright as the previous two sessions but still manageable.

Renyuan and I were leaders of this group of 7~9 kids...

then

nth happened.

 

everybody went home and lived happily everafter.

全国哀悼日停止一切活动，三天。

到处都是一片黑白，现在所有华人都是四川人。

我们真团结

但是希望不要像韩寒所说的个别愤qing那样，都是些赶集的。

 

 

    14时28分04秒

　　我的朋友，这一时刻，
　　我们要把它记住。

　　我们要，
　　亲吻被灾难摧残的生命；
　　我们要送他们走上回家的路。

　　这一刻，
　　国土上红色的旗帜垂头致意；
　　这一刻，
　　大江上的汽笛呜咽哭泣；

　　这一刻，我的朋友，
　　如果你在开车，
　　就让喇叭替你喊出撕裂的肺腑；
　　如果你在行走，
　　你一定会肃立拉起陌生人的手。

　　这一刻，
　　孩子们不舍的眼神在最后一次张望，
　　我的朋友，
　　请悄悄藏起你的花衣服。

　　这一刻，我的朋友，
　　让我们站起身，低下头，
　　让生命的尊严在哀乐声中接受礼赞，
　　让正在升空的灵魂不感受一丝孤独，

　　这一刻，我的朋友，
　　我们要把它记住。

 

 

 

 

在搜狐上看到的，

等会儿14时28分，大家轻默哀三分钟。

 

Yeap so I now typing about yesterday which I came home after going for CIP at the childrens home yesterday after my 2.4km napfa test which was after my collection of my papers which was after I ve reached school at 7.35 am which was after I realise I was late........with fellow txys.

 

I didnt expect to pass some subjects and didnt expect to fail some subjects which both came true in the end.

And I ran my 2.4 with the tune of Shadow Of The Day going through in my head but I forgot the lyrics half way so I changed it to Right Where It Belongs yet the beats were too slow so eventually I didnt run with any imaginary music.

I made 15.10min, it s a borderline B, B would mean <15.11, which is 4 points, yet it doesnt matter cos I got 12.40secs for my shuttle run which is a D which means I wont get my Gold this year. Well it's okay, my PE isnt my most screwed subject. Yewww.

 

Took mrt to amk station to meet up with txys and I was there 30mins earlier. Thus I found a corner to sit down and started drawing.

Was'nt productive at all, sadly.

 

And kids at the children's home were really challenging.

Yuxiang and Renyuan 's were in charge of this group of 5 naughtiest lil boys there, who are about 7~8 year old. Then according to qiongye, they lost control...So I subbed renyuan, cos I looked like I was able to deal with them..

yea, so I tried my best to act like an eight year old too. Succeed.

Hope I 'll be going there again next thursday, it s really fun and I feel so contented when we left. Though not many kids said bye to us cos most of them were at the playground.

 

 

Then I had sorethroat today, really bad one.

Not from the cip but more of 2.4...I ate chocolates before I ran thinking that it would provide me with energy, and I forgot to drink water.

So the sore throat developed into runny nose, for the whole day I was like some dog sniffing non stop. My nose is damn itchy now.

Soon I will be having fever, better sleep now.

 

Oh,

I got a borderline 3.6 for my aep, the most disappointing moment of the whole after mya period.

Mrs Lai is damn cute. For our sova paper, she added most of our marks wrongly, like for some of the papers she didnt even count the last 2 pages?

So liqing added 20 marks to her paper after counting again...20 MARKS EH. Mrs Lai is sooo pro...ha.

We did some sova thingy for a while before starting on charcoal drawing. Mrs Lai didnt hire any model so we drew the headless sussie holding a mask.

I was aready breaking down when I was about 2/3 done, so just scribbled all the rest.

Charcoal sticks are so soft, I like.

 

 

 

 

I m really traumatized by someone's action these few days, I never knew a person would be so brainless to say such things.

And the best part is, she didnt do it intentionally, she thought I'll really like the aftermath..HELL NO?

Yet, I, cant, blame, her.

 

that s why I m even more pissed, she caused inconvenience to me yet I cant be pissed over her. just because she is so fucking innocent and didnt meant any harm?

 

dislike smart alecks for screwing things up for me.

some guy s another one. I just find it too mean to say it straight to his face but...yea, thank you guys for spoiling my image. Or maybe I never had any.

BUT NOW IT S EVEN MORE SCREWED

 

 

but cmon nobody cares that *toot* doesnt care so I guess it's no big deal but so what if *toot* cares oh man *toot* wouldnt! I should stop thinking too much.

(just today, I thought of the storyline of a novel which I liked alot when I was 8. I wish I were like the female character, 可以是一个乐队的灵魂,together with the rest of the band.As long as that is fulfilled the rest would be easy...but no point.) =.=" I m such a (*^!&@%#^%!$@!%#$ ........................

 

Yelin you retard you should go offline now.

 

既生瑜何生亮.....你看不到莲花，再看牡丹还不是是一样的美?

But I guess it's OKAY~

 

我妈那天跟我说，谁谁谁，谁谁谁，"都比你有学问，读的书比你多"，问我是不是很惭愧。想了想到真是有点儿……

鄙人不碰书本很多年……很多年啊很多年~

自从开始泡坛子以来几乎每读过什么有价值的东西，八九岁的时候虽然说很爱看书，但比较深的还看不太懂，所以也就一只停滞在世界名著那个阶段了。。

咱自己的四大名著也就读过图画版=.="

鄙视自己一千次。

 

决定这个假期回家搜罗国内的好书，真的读，而不只是摆在家里觉得有成就感。。。。

 

 

还有，昨天很开心。

“想看你看的世界~想在你梦的画面~ 靠在一起就能感觉甜蜜~~~~”

yeaaaahhhhhhhhhh maaaannnnnnnn.....

 

分别去看了玩具博物馆，NAFA的一个graduation exhibition,还有SAM里一个法国人跟徐悲鸿的展览……

=====================

玩具博物馆：

 

长了见识拍了照，一个一个的铁皮玩具真是爱不则手啊。。。俺全都想偷回来摆家里。

=====================

NAFA exhibition:

 

这个去错了，本来是为了一个学校的literature review要去看"some NAFA exhibition",结果原来那个展览在national museum...

我搞错了居然去的是人家NAFA本身的insider exhibition..所以在一个个成品面前徘徊的我显得那么的格格不入啊~

对于作品，觉得大同小异。。。都很有个性，但都很格式化，好像从一个老师所教出来的。有些人运用的时下流行的元素都跟自己的主题不符合，达不到communicating的效果……

 

或者说，我的资历什么的看不出来那些作品的深意吧……(那大众更看不出来了不是么)

 

印象比较深刻的都是那些学生们的装束。

那叫一个视觉冲击啊，那叫一个attention grabbing啊……

谁是毕业的学生谁是观者一眼就看出来滴……大家都好像要去pubbing还是什么的=.=

非常高调。

甭说，还真好看……但风头都让衣服抢了。。。

=====================

 

Singapore arts museum:

 

对那个不认识的法国人的画作印象比较强……素描巴黎，简洁有味道，纷乱的线条却不觉得纷乱=.="不知道怎么形容，喜欢……自己的炭笔需要几十年啊。。。

"觉得自己15年画的都是大便"..这是当然

 

徐悲鸿的……厄……倒是对炭笔的比较感兴趣。。油画跟马我都不会欣赏。。。不喜欢=.="

觉得马的pose很别扭……但是鬃毛很飘逸。

书法很好看，在我这个完全不懂书法的外行人眼里

======================

 

就这样吧……贴张片，有意思的

"He was frowning when I kissed him,bastard."

"终有一天，你会吃腻千篇一律的猫粮"

 

I shall emo at the above quote for this entire day.

Wtf, dont you think it s so bloody sad for nice man to say such things?

This guy s a photographer who posts cat pictures on forums..and they are awesome, and from all this photo caption you are able to tell how gentle this gentleman is..

The only time I saw him spitting vulgarities was when he saw this post about a guy who bought a cat on impulse and doesnt know how to take care of it.

 

I had like 5 dreams last night which I am able to remember, amazing right?

 

The first one was about the math paper, I got it back and realise it was a bother line pass, for that split second I was the happiest girl in the galaxy.But to realise it was only a dream now...zzzzz. Whatever.

 

The second one was about me escaping from the police, cos I was a drug dealer or sth, and killed alot of people, along that line. I remember I was running from one building to another, one city to the next one, and finally I was back to the original place where I dont see any policemen around. I just took a stroll in the park, thinking about all that have happened, all the evil things I have done. And suddenlty I saw the police officer, "oh shit". Then I ve decided to walk towards him before he starts chasing me, I told him I m really tired to run anymore, mentally. So I hugged him from the back (?) that he could carry me up (?). Yeah guess it s becos he s really hot and is about 20+. Welllllllllllllllllllllllllllll. Then I was told that I wont be executed, but being put in an asylum (?). I was like, oh fine, nothin wrong with an asylum other than no internet access. And I requested to use the comp for one last time before they bring me there... the end.

 

3rd one was similar to the second because I was like some superwoman, able to climb builings and fly blah blah blah. I reember I was on some mission, in hwachong...Realising I was in hwachong I started looking for familiar faces, till I spotted mao and his friends...I saw sean too. The guy whom I met once during the post box days...So anyway, I was to hold on to this balloon so I could fly and thus defeat the evil.....I flew towards the mao gang, pretending I didnt see him..yea then I screwed up and the ballon was releasing air, end up that I had to blow another ballon to keep flying. The girl beside mao was like helping m to blow..damn embarrassing...and that s the end. I remembered myself having this assistant, but cant remember who..it s a woman.

 

The forth one...I was in baoguan, when I saw zhengxiang I was so excited to tell him that I dreamt of mao.(cool right, in the 3rd dream I was aware that I dream of mao in the previous dream) Surprisingly he paid me attention. Then all the people were sitting in small groups discussing about sth,

 

and dianjun came to sit beside me and told me "之前，我觉得你不像人。现在，你像个女的, 以后你会变成小孩" (doesnt make sense but in the dream it made alot of sense to me I dont know why).

Then I replied, "你知道我一只觉得你很像。。。。"

dianjun asked "什么？"

I replied, "一个很受女人欢迎的人。。。。(was thinking that it s a bit 过分if I tell him straight that he looks like 唐僧)"

he was smart, "唐僧啊。。。"

I " 是=.="

 

the convo s retarded..

Then, we starting doing work, like most people are writing sth and man hua people were sitting in front of the comp drawing or doing 版. I got myself a tablet PC, so excited that I kept repeating the same line to zikun "yea tablet PC yea tablet PC yea tablet PC....." then some 鹰women opposite me told me that I shouldnt bang the table or else she cant write. Was super angry cos 老娘没有撞桌子！then yea that s about it. remembered very clearly that zikun was on my left and renyuan was on my right...

 

ok here comes the last dream. I went to the toilet in bao guan, and realise that it was haunted, there were something wrong with the mirrors.  I see myself 翻白眼 in the mirrior despite me not moving at all..and I kept see people floating around me, talking in a very freaky pitch. And when I went into the cubicles I could see people floating in and out of the cubicle door despite it s CLOSED.so scary right? But in the dream I was just like.."why so weird one". Then I died, I remember my mom coming into the cubicle to wrap my body, it was said that  died of dehydration. When my mom brought me back to baoguan where everyone should be, I saw that most people have died too due to dehydration! And they died not because there is not water, but that they cannot absorb it or sth...I dont know why I was alive again, so I was going around checking on people. Then I discovered zhengxiang dying in a room, with his grandpa sister and his mom taking care of him..and his sister is very very very pretty..yea then I was like feeding him water which his mom passed to me, then he spilt everything out and his mom and grandpa started laughing "HAHAHA, THAT IS YOUR GRANDPA'S HAIR GEL" or sth like that. anyway everything in the dream didnt make sense.

 

So I slept from 12 last night till 3 plus today, which explains why theres room for so many dreams. Oh, they were all coloured btw.

 

 

 

 

Haha like some days ago on the bus home I told tianyuan I d be really crazy if I go to sph on saturday again, Well yes I was realy crazy but I told myself that "I M GOING THERE TO STUDY and clear my doubts on physics with maybe some pro-ded sph seniors who happen to remember reflection refratcion and waves blah blah".

Unfortunately that didnt happen,as expected...

And I ponned ms goh s math tuition too, or esle I wont have time for physics and bio and aep which I m having it s retest on tueday, which I initially wanted to use that time for math. This is so screwed but I m so happy I ve never felt this contented before like every second of my life now is important ouh ouh ouh ouh ouh ouh ouh!

 

and let me talk about another crazy thing I did.

I went for the RJC chinese drama concert with YY and her friends!

Saw like dont know how many familiar faces there, to realise that RI is also performing some skit...

and my impression of RI people really went (^!@&#%!^%#$!($&%&*@%.

WTF, THE SKIT IS LIKE SO LOUSY COMPARED TO THE REST TWO YET THEY GOT THE MOST APPLAUSE

WHILE I SUPPOSE ALL THE RI PEOPLE KEPT THEIR HANDS IN THEIR POCKETS FOR THE RJC PERFORMANCE....

Well isnt that basic manners to acknowledge someone else's effort...or were they just doing it on purpose to show that "omg I m so cool you know I didnt want to come for this stupid thing if not FOR MY FRIENDS. That s why I have to show that I m not interested in their performance at all Omg I m so cool zzzz"

K that s just what I think but still.....it was totally 冷场for the first skit...I wonder how those actors feel on stage.

 

YEAh the 绝爱.情was so high...Its a gay story, talking about how a 帅哥单恋the other 帅哥, but the other 帅哥got very disgusting by his affection blah blah...

期间，两个帅哥有摸大腿哦~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 嗷嗷嗷嗷嗷嗷嗷嗷嗷嗷嗷。

one of the actor is called LI KE, 李可。cool right, LIKE. "hey my name s LIKE"

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAH

and after the performance I dragged YY infront to take photos with the 帅哥s~ and now she refuse to send it to me cos she thinks that I will just stare at it and not study for my exam.

 

Oh yeah.

Yeah so isnt it quite crazy to watch come drama performance just days before your exam?

And now i m blogging and getting high.

HOHO.

 

 

And I m broke...cos on friday before going for the concert I ate pastamania with YY, and yesterday dinner with txys were at pizzahut...

30 bucks gone...two meals only T_T

maybe it s not alot for SOME OF YOU but I m very 心痛 嗷嗷嗷嗷嗷嗷嗷嗷嗷~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

five 30bucks can get me a tablet..

zzzz

 

 

 

 

 

And let me emo abit, because I fell from the escalator while running down..and very deep cut on my elbow and disgusting not-as-deep scratches on my butt and legs.

so embarrasing though nobody saw..cos it was damn late like 11 plus. Do you know how it feels to darg yourself up just becos you have to hurry, despite you re like 一 瘫软泥, your elbow feeling like it s broken,YOUR LEGS BLEEDING AND YOUR MUSCLES CRAMPING....

zzzzzzzzzzzz.

and the best part is......

people make me sound like I m being 大惊小怪

if you cant feel how I feel...then stfu....and by right you should feel how I feel. Disappointing